21 August 2007

I'm in BryzgaLove.

Okay so if you know me, or have ever met me even briefly, or have so much as just seen pictures of me, or have ever remotely broached the subject of fashion/clothing/etc. with me, you're well aware of the fact that I have probably never worn something that actually matched for a day of my life. Or at least since I've been dressing myself.

With that in mind, I think you can now all understand beyond the shadow of a doubt how I can hate the Ducks, but love Ilya Bryzgalov:

It was brought to my attention earlier that Bryzgalov brought the cup back to his native Russia (Togliatti, to be exact) on Monday, August 6th. It (and Bryz) were mobbed outside the airport by people chanting his name, took part in a parade (at 6 am), went on to Volga Sports Palace, where Bryz played hockey before coming over to the NHL, Avto-VAZ, the company where Bryz's father works, then on a three hour cruise, and then to an office where his best friend and sister work.

And Ilya did it all in that absolute debacle of a shirt. People probably had seizures. That guy in the background of the picture has got to be laughing at the shirt. There is just no doubt. I ask you, how do you not appreciate that? (And don't lie. A tiny little part of you wishes you owned it.)

In case you thought that was the best part, though, I have news for you - not even close. In fact, the part of this journey that I left out?

"At suppertime, a small group went to Long John Silver's, a pirate-themed restaurant. An entire show took place while the group was eating dinner – singers, dancers, fiddlers. A large cake was wheeled in and presentations were made while pictures were taken. Then, all of a sudden, pirates invaded the party, emerging seemingly out of thin air. They dragged Bryzgalov down the stairs with the Stanley Cup (gasp!) A cannon was fired and there was much commotion. Bryzgalov emerged a few moments later, dressed like a buccaneer and safely carrying the Stanley Cup."
Yes. I am serious. Really. Serious. Tragically, despite a good couple hours of working my google-fu over at google.ru, I could bring up no photographic evidence (though I did end up with this video, entirely in Russian, where Bryz talks about...something).

Worry not, though - if Sherry can have Martin Gerber dressed up as, well, this, the gods of the internet cannot possibly keep failing me with regard to Buccaneer Bryzgalov. Until then, you all just keep staring at that shirt.

And loving Ilya Bryzgalov.


Earl Sleek said...

That's fantastic, Steph! I commend the pursuit of buccaneerish truth, especially in relation to Breezy's insanity.

Kirsten said...

I LOVE Bryz! Hate the team, love him. He gives the greatest interviews ever.

Steph said...

Earl - It has to be found. I just refused to believe that no one who witnessed this feels the need to plaster it on the internet. And I imagine Breezy would be disappointed if it weren't!

Kirsten - Me too! He's just too darn cute to be hateable, even though you know you should on principle.

Margee said...

That shirt is cute... if you or Ellie or me or any female were wearing it. Yikes!

Wonder how Scrooge McDuck feels about it.

KMS2 said...

WOW! Ok, so I assume the Long John Silver was in Russia?? Which still seems odd, because who goes to LJS to celebrate such an important like, oh, Winning the Stanley Cup!? And I can't quite figure out if the shirt screams, 'I'm homeless', 'Peace not War', 'I'm actually a Grandmother', 'Didn't you know I was a cross dresser?', 'If only the Ducks paid me Jiggy money I would have been able to buy an actual shirt', 'I'm colorblind', or 'That's how I roll'.

Steph said...

Margee, maybe fashion in Russia is just something we are never meant to understand.

Kms2, it was! I was confused about that too - I mean, wouldn't you think you'd find somewhere, well, a little more illustrious than a Long John Silver's? Who knows, maybe they're different in Russia. As for the shirt, I like all of your suggestions, I can't even pick a favorite!

Dwayne said...

I scored 18 goals on him in NHL 2k7 last night with the pens.

I really need to bump up the difficulty :\

Elly said...

Steph: Ilya just keeps getting better and better....and more acid-burning to the eyes, but still better. A pirate? Seriously?

Dwayne: It's not your difficulty setting, it's because the Penguins just rock THAT MUCH.

Dwayne said...

4 players had hat tricks. 4.

Roberts, Armstrong, Malkin and Crosby.

Malkin also won a grand total of 4 fights on the evening. He went undefeated.

In other news, I'm still so bitter about march that I hit 25 points against Ottawa. I also injured Chris Neil. It was awesome.

Tracy said...

I think I saw that shirt on a rack at a thrift store near my house... I'll send you it... you and bryz can be twins! Righteous.

Honestly, though, that shirt is hideous and I can't even look at it with a serious face.

Steph said...

Elly - Yes. A pirate. They should make little collectables of this. A bobblehead of pirate!Bryz? I'd buy it.

Dwayne - I feel you on taking out frustrations with NHL07, I've propelled my Oilers (with the exact same roster as their cup run in 06 minus Chris Pronger and plus Ladislav Smid) to three back to back cup victories.

Tracy - I would LOVE to be twins with Bryz! I mean how cool would that be?!

Elly said...

Dwayne: Ahhh, I see, so....basically next season, then? ;) And it's bad of me to laugh at Ottawa and Chris Neil, isn't it?

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